Coming here gives me such a chance to clear my mind. Just a quick request for prayer: I am recently on the heels of being laid bare by the scripture James 4, and while I didn't really understand what God was trying to show me, after much seeking of Him I believe He is simply convicting me of not submitting fully to Him and He is rooting out idols in my heart. I am glad that He is! But it is not easy! So please pray that I will be obedient. I think God is speaking to me through this scripture about the sarcasm and nagging I have indulged in at times as of late. The idolotry is wanting an important relationship in my life to be all that I feel it 'should' be, this desire sharing the #1 spot in my heart that God alone should be filling. Of course, as the scripture portrays, idolotry leads to expressions of that through the heart and even a controlled heart will leak at times, if it's in there to leak out, so the idols must be de-rooted and unthroned. I have repented of sarcastic tone and nagging at times and would be deeply appriciative of your prayers for the future.
On Sunday we sang a song in church, the refrain being "Give us Jesus. Only Jesus. The pearl of greatest price." I imagined God offering me one thing,one desire of my heart, and what I would say. ( I have quite an imagination, huh! Of course, that will likely Never Happen, but it gave me good meat to chew on, so to speak!) Would I think about it for a moment, or for a few moments, and say " Lord, I would love for this important relationship to be all I think it should be." Or, would it be "Give me Jesus. Only Jesus." I know that God delights in giving his children the desires of their hearts, but that can't Always happen and in This Time can I say " Give me Jesus. Only Jesus." I am, truly, broken and undone. God alone can change peoples hearts, if and when he is willing to do so, and I need to be tristing him and resting in his sovereignty to change my heart or other's hearts and not being angry about not getting what I'd like to see coming from this relationship. Please pray that I will be content with God alone, and focused on what I Can do in this relationship to serve Him- taking my eyes off of what I would like so many times? Thank you from the bottom of my heart! <3