Oct 15, 2007

Psalm 118:13&14~ "I was pushed back and about to fall,but the Lord helped me...
The Lord is my strength and my song;
He has become my salvation."

Dealing with this chronic pain in my ear and jaw on the left side of my head over the last several weeks has forced me more and more to the foot of the cross ... I find that pain can really remind me of how powerless I am, and how much I need God.
In the midst of this suffering I am reminded just how much I need to not be shaken by my circumstances; if I were not being taught so well to make sure that I am talking to myself(speaking the truth to myself) instead of listening to myself(letting my feelings dicatate where I will go in my mind,)then I could see myself kneeling to my feelings in this circumstance a lot more,instead of holding strong to God's promises,like the one above, more often. I still have my moments when I am askingwhy!but, thanks be to the Lord,they are not allowed to go on for long because I am surrounded in my home by the word,godly friends and family and Christ-centered worship cd's in almost every room,all of which point me back to the gospel and back to God's promises for me.

Also dealing with chronic pain has added more temptations to be angry and short-tempered, impatient with people and things,when I want people and things to just be easy for me to deal with, because I 'feel' like my plate is already full, and that God's grace is not sufficient for me to deal with this one more thing...basically,
when I am not loving others sacrificially, but selfishly.

I thank God for conviction and daily bring myself to God for help to walk in faith and obedience. I also thank Him for the desire to be obedient to His word, and the sorrow over my sin,these things that I would not be feeling if I were not saved; thank you God for saving me! I know that God will complete the good work that he has started in me, revealing more and more sin and helping me to defeat it.
I am glad for Him to show me my pride and selfishness in all areas,so that He can
dig out the wickedness in me and replace it with righteousness and humility.
If you feel like adding me to your prayer lists, thank you, and pray for humility for me! It is what I need the most! Thanks :)

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